Wellbeing

Hey! Let’s Stop Choosing Nutritional Death And Spiritual Death! (Healthy Habits Post 4)

/ Lori Lawe / Leave a comment

Why do you spend your money on junk food,
your hard-earned cash on cotton candy?
Listen to me, listen well: Eat only the best,
fill yourself with only the finest.
Pay attention, come close now,
listen carefully to my life-giving, life-nourishing words.

The Message

Just because we make stupid choices sometimes doesn’t mean we have to stay stupid.

In order for us to soar into the purposes and plans God has for us, we have to DESIRE the right things.

Why does the cocaine addict again choose to pick up and use the half-full needle he just found? (Do you use needles for cocaine? Dang! My inner Ned Flanders just can’t be suppressed! At least I didn’t say “Don’t drink drugs” like one of my kids does!)

Why do we, the societally privileged people that we are, look down on the cocaine addict mentioned above, and then again and again, we choose slow death over a victorious, energetic life?

Clearly stated: Why do we CHOOSE junk food?

Exactly like the cocaine addict mentioned above, we DESIRE the wrong things.

Truly soaring can only happen when we DESIRE the right things.

When DESIRE outside of God’s BEST plan for our lives defines us, and we follow the fulfilment of this desire, we are zombies following death wherever it leads.

So WAKE UP!

And eat your vegetables.

And just as we desire the wrongful foods that don’t let us soar, we desire placebos over spiritual fulfillment as well.

So what is the solution to not desiring nutritional health or spiritual health?

God help me to desire the best kind of physical food that will help me to soar in life.

And this prayer:

God help me to desire the best kind of spiritual food that will help me to soar in life.

So let’s ask God to help us DESIRE healthier food more often. For example, we’ll talk about how to ENJOYING eating our vegetables next time.

And let’s listen to uplifting music instead of listening to that gross crap that gets pumped into our ears in every department store we visit.

As we listen to something like this:

Let’s ask God questions like these:

Jesus, how am I chasing my deadly DESIRE when I should be chasing You? How am I blind, like the cocaine addict mentioned above, and think I know what is best for me, by following my desires, when really, I need You to help me completely change my desires?

Can you help me WANT to desire the right things?

There are many, many stories of people who experience a taste of God and then never touch their addictive substance of choice again. That’s cool too.

So let’s keep making time for Jesus by reading God’s word and listening to Holy Spirit in our times of prayer, and by connecting with God-seeking community.

Freedom from desire that leads to death and that masks our desperate need for God is on its way, if we will but stretch out our hands and receive.

How To LOVE Exhausting Yourself Exercising! (Healthy Habits Part 3)

/ Lori Lawe / Leave a comment

Not long ago, I wrote a post outlining Ten Keystone Habits that allowed me to stay within my recommended weight range my entire life. The first keystone habit is to LOVE drinking nothing but water.

The second keystone habit is exercise. Ha! Spellcheck changed EXERcise to EXORcise. Exorcism is a good habit too, but today we’re talking about exercise. The two go hand-in-hand actually. You want to get rid of any negative influences in your life (exorcise) so you can have the energy to do what God is calling you to do.

Tip 1: You want to remember how you feel AFTER you do exercise. Not before. Not during. 

You are going to feel amazing.

In fact, your new identity as a “person who is getting fit” and how you therefore feel is going to fuel this whole thing – all the healthy habits – on losing weight.

So this habit is not to be skipped.

For now, let’s start where we’re at. If all we can do is walk, let’s go for a walk, bring our dog and our friend, get an ice cream after if it’s Sunday – who cares? We did it! Let’s give ourselves a pat on the back.

The passive-aggressive, intense ones among us do better with some challenge to our exercise routines to keep boredom away.

Two examples of exercise challenges from my life:

– I felt God calling me to learn a new sport, squash, in middle age. How is God calling us into a new thing in this next season? Could this be as mundane as exercise, or do we assume God is only interested in more “spiritual” endeavours? (Answer: Nope, He’s interested in guiding us always).

– Dreaming about sports that are sometimes just out of reach due to intermittent back problems keeps me motivated to get stronger: mountain biking, downhill skiing, triathlons, CrossFit, climbing.

Did my 20-year-old climbing gear stored in the basement disintegrate from neglect yet? Dreaming about opening the box again ignites a future challenge that motivates me to do my granny exercises again today.

(Our motivation doesn’t have to necessarily be encumbered by reality).

Tip 2: Have your exercise clothes ready in the bathroom so that as soon as you get up, without thinking, the first thing you do is put them on. Your challenge is to wear exercise clothes all day until you’ve done some exercise. Even if it’s exercising for a few minutes here and there.

Tip 3: Ideally, let’s get out in the morning! This stimulates earlier melatonin release helping us sleep better at night, too.

All in all, we’ve just gotta do it.

So right now, I’m your mother and just do it. The world needs you and your gifts. How are you going to have enough energy to do all the things God is calling you to do if you’re not going to rev your energy levels up by getting some exercise?

This is non-negotiable. 

I feel strongly. You have to listen to me. 

That’s all I have to say for now. Do it or else! 

Goodbye!

How To LOVE Practicing The Healthy Habits You Currently Hate! (Healthy Habits Part 1)

/ Lori Lawe / Leave a comment

Last time I discussed Ten Keystone Habits that allowed me to stay within my recommended weight range my entire life.

I know, I know. At first glance, these habits seem hard, terrible, uninviting. These habits, if you actually did them all, would kill you, you assume.

To prove you wrong (and why else would we write?) I will be starting a series of blog posts on healthy habits.

These posts will outline how you too, can learn to LOVE practicing healthy habits OR how to at least delude yourself into thinking you enjoy healthy habits. What’s the difference?

First of all, it’s good to know yourself and understand what motivates you. I’m actually the kind of person, for example, who hates it when people tell me what to do.

I figured this out one afternoon when I was frothing at the mouth and making myself some tea. “How DARE they tell me when to drink this tea?”, I thought, fuming. “I’ll drink it in the afternoon instead, just to spite them!” The tea was called English BREAKFAST tea. BREAKFAST.

I guess you’re supposed to drink it at BREAKFAST. How dare they!

Ok, so I know I should probably get counselling about this. And I do get counselling but my hard-working counsellor hasn’t gotten this far down the list of priority items that I need remediation for yet.

I know I could have been, actually a lot more successful in life if I had taken people’s advice a little more easily. You can check out my daughter’s blog for that. For example, in this post, she mentions some stuff she learned from me. I’m sure she’ll go far.

Anyway, we are what we are.

Therefore, none of these Ten Keystone Habits are things you CAN’T do. If I had habits that forced me to NOT do certain things, I’d rather not live, okay?!

This blog post series will describe how to ENJOY the healthy habits that help us maintain a healthy weight, and allow us to have more energy to complete the calling God has for each of our lives. (This stuff matters more than we realize).

For example, check out this ancient quote:

Friends, don’t get me wrong: By no means do I count myself an expert in all of this, but I’ve got my eye on the goal, where God is beckoning us onward—to Jesus. I’m off and running, and I’m not turning back.

So let’s keep focused on that goal, those of us who want everything God has for us. If any of you have something else in mind, something less than total commitment, God will clear your blurred vision—you’ll see it yet! Now that we’re on the right track, let’s stay on it.

Stick with me, friends. Keep track of those you see running this same course, headed for this same goal. There are many out there taking other paths, choosing other goals, and trying to get you to go along with them. I’ve warned you of them many times; sadly, I’m having to do it again. All they want is easy street. They hate Christ’s Cross. But easy street is a dead-end street. Those who live there make their bellies their gods; belches are their praise; all they can think of is their appetites.

But there’s far more to life for us. We’re citizens of high heaven! We’re waiting the arrival of the Savior, the Master, Jesus Christ, who will transform our earthy bodies into glorious bodies like his own. He’ll make us beautiful and whole with the same powerful skill by which he is putting everything as it should be, under and around him.

The Message

What more can be said than that?

The second post in this Healthy Habits series, How To LOVE Drinking Nothing But Water! will be posted soon!

Ten Keystone Habits To Achieve A Healthy Weight And Stay There

/ Lori Lawe / Leave a comment

“Well, that must be nice for you,” they spit at me. (Wait, I know you don’t spit, either. We talked about that in another post. But it ruins the effect, if I don’t keep that part. You can’t expect perfect truth in every blog post.)

Anyway, my mouth was full of chocolate, some of it dripping from the corners of my mouth. “Huh?” I asked.

She continued, “Well, you can obviously eat whatever you want.”

I guessed she was referring to the fact that I am a healthy weight and my mouth was currently full of chocolate – overfull actually.

But what she didn’t see were the habits I (ir)regularly follow behind the scenes.

Here they are.

A caveat before we begin is that I’ve never had professional training as a nutritionist. But I’ve read a ton on the side about food and health. And like a boxer in a ring, who has been fighting her entire life with someone about the same strength as her, I have maintained a healthy weight my entire life.

This didn’t come easy.

I’m still fighting.

(Following God’s direction and a neurologist’s advice, I also prepared the food that healed my kid’s learning disabilities, but that is a discussion for another time).

This is what I do to fight the temptations and the cultural normalcy of food that is anything but normal or healthy.

I made my own point system, and give myself two points daily for each healthy habit completed. One point if I grew in habit development that day.

Here are my top ten habits. The total maximum points in a day is 20 points.

1. Two points for drinking the recommended water allocation in a day.

2. Two points for doing one hour of exercise. Must break a sweat to get two points.

3. Two points for eating a green smoothie in the morning.

4. Two points for having a salad for lunch.

5. Two points for having cut-up veggies and a yummy dip available so these can be snacked on during the day.

6. Two points for eating one plate of food and then waiting 20 minutes before having seconds.

7. Two points for having a cup of chamomile tea with honey and nothing else after dinner.

8. Two points for not eating breakfast till 10:00 am.

9. Two points for having an energy ball (fruit and cheese, or fruit and nuts can be substituted in a pinch) in mid-afternoon.

10. This is my favourite habit and I will explain why when I describe it in a minute. Two points for not having any dessert if today is a Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday or Saturday.

The happy side effect of this habit is that since dessert is allowed on Sunday, we get two points for eating dessert on Sunday! Stuff your face with chocolate on Sunday, let it drip from the corners of your mouth (Why does that happen so often to me?) and watch them bemoan the fact that you’ve never even tried, yet you are a healthy weight.

Ha! The joke’s on them.

Why growing in these habits can eventually become an absolute delight will be discussed next time.

Mourning Together With Coyotes Is Healthy

/ Lori Lawe / Leave a comment

My dog is smarter than he looks.

I mean, he doesn’t look that smart when the fire engine or the coyotes are howling outside, and our dog howls along with them.

Does he not know he is not a fire truck? Or a coyote?

But he is definitely smarter than he looks.

For example, once on a walk, I suddenly heard coyotes howling very close to us. (There is a real world outside of LA where actual trees and flowers exist!).

I quickly grabbed onto his leash. I was certain my fluffy mini-golden doodle would head for the middle of the pack and howl along with them, making his dog dreams a reality (Being called a “doodle” is never cool in coyote society. Being called “fluffy” doesn’t help either. Or “mini.”)

But instead, tail between his legs, he hunkered down and ran home, me stumbling along behind him.

When we got safely inside, and he was protected by a locked door, he opened his mouth wide, and howled in freedom, just one of the pack.

He somehow knew that the coyotes would eat him if they got a chance. But that didn’t stop him from also knowing that mourning with others is healthy.

I feel the same way actually.

I know I will never be accepted into a pack of coyotes.

But that doesn’t change the fact that I want to learn to mourn, to lament in my community with the freedom of a coyote.

“. . . weep with those who weep” Ancient Text

You may think you’ve heard coyotes wail because you watched a John Wayne movie once, but the lamenting, prolonged howl of a group of coyotes is really nothing like that.

Coyotes send shivers down your spine when you hear them mournfully wailing.

You kind of think they’ll shut up after a few minutes but they don’t. It can go on for hours, sometimes in the middle of the day.

“What in the world are they crying about?” I finally wondered.

Coyotes mourn in packs in the fall, when a younger coyote sets off on his own. (I read that on the internet*.)

And so this is what we can learn from coyotes:

1. They mourn together as a group and out loud.

2. They mourn about one thing, and then gracefully interweave their sadness to other stuff that is also breaking their little hearts. (Give me a break here – I know we can’t read the minds of coyotes, but this is my interpretation of what they’re saying. Do you have a better idea of what coyotes think about when they mourn in the fall? No, I thought not!)

3. This grieving process helps them. I mean most of the time coyotes are pretty well-adjusted, right? 50% of them are not sucking back Prozac or the equivalent, like us humans. Maybe we can learn from them.

I’ll explain what we can learn next time.

* Scientific Information Source

The Nature Conservancy: “There’s also a lot of contradictory information – and complete nonsense – written about coyotes.”

Blogpost Footnotes

No! I’m not a coyote-ologist or whatever that’s called. No! I’ve never even studied coyotes. Why do you ask?

Oh! I did read a really funny Canadian classic book once called Never Cry Wolf, and wolves are sort of like coyotes, I think. Does that count?

Anyway, I know the next blog post outlining what I’ve learned from coyotes will help you.

You’re welcome!

Good luck!

An Encouragement: What is the ULTIMATE Homeschool Rhythm?

/ Lori Lawe / 1 Comment

I was sipping a summer drink, my shoulders draped with a blanket. I can’t QUITE bring myself to wear a sweater yet, but the leaves of fall are dropping, reminding me with the cool breeze that the days of summer are ending.

I found myself pondering the successes and challenges of the past homeschooling year, hoping that the total number of wins outscored the total number of defeats.

Then I took a fresh page, another sip of my iced drink, and pondered the coming year.

There is a certain RHYTHM to homeschooling, as there is a RHYTHM to the best things of life: summer-fall-winter-spring, or sunrise-daytime-sunset.

What is the ULTIMATE homeschool rhythm?

After much strategic thinking, erasing, and pulling from my wisdom of X years (I will NEVER admit I homeschooled THAT LONG!) of homeschooling, I think the ultimate rhythm goes something like this:

1) Read good books aloud to our children.

2) Focus on the relationship with each child. Talk to and listen to them.

3) Spend a 1/2 hour yelling at them and watching them cry during “math”.

And that’s it!

The ULTIMATE life of a homeschooler!

Repeat tomorrow!

By the way, both of my kids made it to high school math (pat on the back for me please). I’m thinking there are a LOT of martinis I’ve earned and saved for getting them that far.

Well done, mom, dad! You made it through math today! (Don’t have a martini yet – I was just joking).

Or maybe it’s not math but insert-monster-of-choice-here: toilet training, setting limits on technology, grammar, drawing lessons. (True story. One of my friend’s kids cried every time the art supplies emerged).

We all have our own battles but you get it.

On reflecting a bit more after writing this out (I process my thoughts via writing – thank you for reading and therefore helping me to think more clearly) I think the conclusive ALL ENCOMPASSING homeschool rhythm is the following:

1. Kids are trying to drive us crazy, to lose our sanity. This is called “sanctification” to us. It’s good for you (albeit eventually).

2. Don’t let them.

3. Bake cookies with them, or declare Pajama Day and watch a movie and eat popcorn with them.

4. Repeat.

(5. My editor keeps trying to delete this next one – I don’t know why!) When your kids are about to leave home, drink all the martinis you didn’t have on every bad homeschooling day. (And let’s admit it, there were a lot of bad days).

OK! OK! I won’t include that one!

My editor reminds me that I am in a sort of grieving process as my oldest child is getting ready to leave the nest and fly off to University.

Whole can of crazy is down there in my heart, waiting to get stirred up.

Well – ENOUGH writing for today! I’m fine!!!

Jesus Longs To Guide You Through Pain (And Hold Your Hand)

/ Lori Lawe / 1 Comment

I hobbled around, one hand on my back, bent over and twisted.

I did too much at my new CrossFit class, and I could feel the muscles in my lower back clenching, pushing me into a C-shape. Maybe this strain will get better on its own? I was in denial, but my body kept slowly bending me over.

The name of my chiropractor popped into my head. Oh right! But we were leaving on holiday. I didn’t have time. I continued to pack, holding my aching back. But again, and again her name went through my head that morning, as I was thinking of other things.

This is one of the ways God speaks to me. He reminds me, again and again.

I don’t always notice the first time.

So I called the chiropractor, the one I hadn’t seen in five months, the one I had somehow forgotten about after a season of happy back. She surprisingly had one cancellation that morning, which worked perfectly before we left on holiday.

Her touch was like the hand of God. I don’t mean to be overly dramatic but that is what it felt like to me. My body obeyed her and re-aligned. My posture was upright. I (carefully) went about my day and in only several days, instead of several months, I was running again.

“Yeah, I don’t even know how I found her,” I mentioned to my husband offhandedly, as I distractedly finished my lunch. I had forgotten.

The next morning, my prayer group reminded me.

Years earlier, a friend had some trouble with her foot. She mentioned the name of the person who is now my chiropractor.

Her, Jesus seemed to say.

My friend was reluctant to give me her contact information. “I have no idea what she’s like concerning backs,” she cautioned.

Her, Jesus repeated.

I was in a phase of rejecting all therapy.

Everything I tried, every physiotherapist, chiropractor, masseuse, and others had made me worse. Much worse. I was afraid to try anyone else. “I’ll just have to solve this on my own,” I had thought.

But with a nudge from God, I made the call.

I was tense and nervous in her office that first day.

But she became the gift God gave to me.

I could run faster, complete the triathlon, and horse around with the kids again sooner, much sooner.

(There is Another and another who helped my back a ton as well, but those are different stories).

God walked with me in my pain and His Spirit guided me to a person who used her skills to allow God’s healing through my body.

And I am thankful for her.

And I have remembered, now, to be thankful to God for her, too.

If I dwell by the farthest oceans, even there your hand will guide me. Ancient Text

Need some advice?

Ask!

God, you long to give out treasures, but we so infrequently come to You to receive. Help us, Jesus, to run to You as a small child in distress runs to their father, longing for an embrace. May we receive Your love, and may Your hand guide us ever more often to the gifts You long to pour out upon us, as a good father loves to give good gifts to his children. May we trust You more deeply with our headaches, heartaches, body aches, and spiritual aches.