How To Succeed In Life? (It Is The Exact Same Way You Triumph In Chess!)

Join me in being successful at BOTH life AND chess, friends!

grayscale photo of person holding glass

I enjoyed playing cribbage for quite a while until my husband won too frequently and then (for some reason that’s hard to explain) cribbage lost some of its joy for me.

Before his (short!) winning streak, I happened to be a much better cribbage player than my husband and consistently would win! Not that this matters, of course. But it’s fun to play games with our spouse, and to enjoy each other!

Join people in sixty- seven countries who read this. (Look! I don’t know why people read this stuff, either! It must be because they’re cool, too!) Let’s journey together.

I do like to win, yes, and I know that doesn’t matter.

But still, it was time to find a new game. Something that I am good at. “Extra good at,” is what I was thinking.

NOT like playing Settlers of Catan, which I will NEVER play with him again! (Yes, he wins WAY too often, which isn’t helpful for my self-esteem!)

I think he should let ME win because it’s (objectively – he agrees after the game is over!) good for our marriage!

So, we began playing chess together, instead. Now I’m at the same level as my husband. But I’m learning how to win at LIFE because I played CHESS!

“How?” you ask, mesmerized.

Well, let me explain.

For example, that day recently when my husband and I were driving in the car and he (mildly) challenged me about something, I DIDN’T DO what I normally would have done BEFORE we started playing chess!

My temptation WOULD HAVE BEEN to immediately fire back a challenge at him (to keep the power balance in my favor – see the helpful explanation HERE!). However, I didn’t fire back a sharp rebuke, because I remembered that that was actually how he won when we played chess!

Learning in chess was helping me learn in life!

“But I will NOT lose in life!” I decided!

So the next time my husband mildly challenged me in the car that day with something I could do differently, I thought, “Ha! I’m not going to let him win! I’m NOT going to challenge him back!” And THAT’S how I won that argument!

(Wait! Do you think it’s possible that he knows me well enough to use my – decidedly minor – character flaws against me? No. That could never be. That’s MY tactic, not HIS!)

Well, you know, you want to marry someone who has a similar level of emotional intelligence to you, because it makes sparring more fun together, just like playing chess together!

. . .our foremost efforts should be to help others live well

The Message

I showed this encouraging quote to my husband, and I hope it helps him enjoy playing chess with me more! And I hope this article helps you, too! May you, too, be increasingly successful at both life AND chess!

You’re welcome!

Good luck!

Life is short. Why not laugh a bit more? (Wait! WITH me or AT me? Whatever!) Let’s journey together.

Photo Credit – THIS Is The Purpose Of Playing Games! (To Have Fun, Of Course!) by GR Stocks on Unsplash

How To ACTUALLY Eat Less Sugar (But Don’t Do It!)

Shh . . . My top tip for eating less sugar is something that I will never admit to doing!

But I will tell you what it is in the article published earlier this week HERE (I will never confess to doing this, though!).

AND two MORE (!) helpful tips for eating less sugar are coming soon! What is the definition of ‘Helpful’?” I can hear you asking. The definition is confidential, of course!

You’re welcome!

Good luck!

Join people in sixty-six countries who read this! (Look! I don’t know why people read this stuff, either! It must be because they’re cool, too!) Let’s journey together!

Photo Credit – When Is Enough Enough? (Who Knows!) by Kendall Burch on Unsplash

Free Time Is Stupid!

There’s something even better than “free” time, friend!

a scrabble of words spelling use your gifts

I poured my heart out, wondering how to direct my (useful and helpful!) energies in this next season, since my kids had both recently moved out.

“Well, you can do crossword puzzles,” my friend offered helpfully. He was lucky I didn’t kill him right there. (I felt like strangling him).

Join people in sixty-five countries who read this! (Look! I don’t know why people read this stuff, either! It must be because they’re cool!) Let’s journey together!

If I had to do crossword puzzles for the rest of my life, I would probably just throw them all out the window and kill everyone who came near me.

Which reminds me of my dad’s first few weeks in the care home just after he had developed dementia. My dad hadn’t said anything that the caregivers could understand for three weeks. Then one day, my dad said, “Get me the ‘F’ out of here.”

“That was clear,” offered the head nurse.

So, doing crossword puzzles reminds me a bit of when they tried to give my dad crayons at that care home after his very clear words, above. My brother said, “I wouldn’t have liked to have been the one who handed him the crayons!” That’s exactly how I feel!

My dad is the only one who understands me, and he’s demented!

And anyway, how old am I1? But the point is that some think I’m at the end of my usefulness to society because my kids are old enough to have moved out? That’s not what the lesson of the dragonfly (and God!) taught me.

Read that article HERE because you probably didn’t bother to read it the first time, and you need to remember truths like this if you are floundering in your next season.

And remember, don’t do crossword puzzles for the rest of your life! Especially if that thought makes you feel like killing everyone around you! I hope that helps!

You’re welcome!

Good luck!

We showed you how to pull your weight when we were with you, so get on with it. We didn’t sit around on our hands expecting others to take care of us. In fact, we worked our fingers to the bone . . . And it wasn’t because we didn’t have a right to your support; we did.

The Message

As the song below sings, “nothing to gain, nothing to lose . . . nothing to prove . . . it’s right where I’m supposed to be,” should we consider pondering whether it COULD it be that the cultural gold medal of “early retirement,” or time “off” after 5:00 pm, could be another opportunity to step into the next phase of God’s plan for our lives?

Join people in sixty-five countries who read this! (Look! I don’t know why people read this stuff, either! It must be because they’re cool!) Let’s journey together!

Photo Credit: (Let God Show You How To) Use Your Gifts by Brett Jordan on Unsplash

1 I’m not telling – How dare you ask!

Hack: You’ll Actually Have Opportunities When You’re Older If You Trick Them When You’re Young!

C’mon, friend – be like me!

woman in black leather jacket smiling

I know that I can (sometimes!) come off as a bit neurotic and whiny in my online writing. (I’ll have to complain to my editor about that! THAT CAN’T be my TRUE voice – of course!). Anyway, it turns out that I am considering going back to Grad school again to prove myself to the world since all my kids moved out and I don’t have a purpose anymore (Or – I mean – to learn more stuff to help people). Whatever!

My writing reaches people in 65 countries, so join us by being uniquely you! (And by doing what everyone else does!)

Anyway, the point is that I’m not as much of a loser as I sometimes hint at because I drop words like “Grad School.” (Wait! My editor is right that our identity is not based on what we do, but on who we are as those whom God loves! I sometimes forget theological details- Whatever!)

What I wanted to say is that you should trick them when you’re young, so you have opportunities when you are older!

“What do you mean?” you ask, raptly attentive to my next sentence.

Well, a woman I was chatting with remarked offhandedly, “He is soo smart! I wasn’t lucky enough to get that!” she said. I think she meant, “Brains.”

But here’s the thing – some of the smartest people I know aren’t that smart.

For example, a PhD friend who knows more than anyone else in the world about fern frond spores (a real-life example!) said that he wasn’t the smartest person in his class, but he worked the hardest.

What if showing up is more important than whining about the fact that you THINK you missed the lineup where certain “gifts” were handed out?

We sell ourselves short in so many ways. We cancel ourselves. We say we can’t. Our vision is too small.

What if:

As long as we don’t give up.

For example:

One day many years ago, I DECIDED to try for straight A’s at school. I DIDN’T stand around waiting for my profs to give me an “A” – they didn’t. Instead, I spent every last second in the free physics tutoring center until they had to kick us out when it got dark every night, AND I READ BOOKS like this one about HOW to do well in school. (There are more “tricks to learn” than “awards for the right type of brain”, I learned).

What if I showed up and had a growth mindset that I COULD grow a bit better, even if I (supremely) annoyed those around me?

Anyway, I DID get excellent grades after that DECISION (Note: Key word!) to do well.

And one potential Grad Advisor wrote me back this week to say that he would consider me for Grad school again NOW, BECAUSE I was such a great Grad student back THEN.

So, look at the opportunities dropping in my lap because I tricked them back then into thinking I was brilliant (In reality, I just showed up a LOT and worked hard!) (See the title of this article to come full circle on the point of this article).

However, I hope that none of my prospective Grad Advisors read this article, or if they do, they’ll know that it’s NOT that I’m amazing but just that I THINK that I’m amazing.1

And so, I leave you today with this profound thought to mull over:

What would you start or stop or begin or continue if you were S.T.U.P.I.D.er.*

*Note: S.T.U.P.I.D. is an “acronym” – read more HERE to find the details of this “highly patented” – definition confidential- process! (It means that you kept walking in the same direction, and didn’t give up, even though many people may have wanted you to!)

You’re welcome!

Good luck!

Forget about what’s happened; don’t keep going over old history. Be alert, be present. I’m about to do something brand-new. It’s bursting out! Don’t you see it?

The Message

Oh! And spiritual growth works that way, too!

(What’s your next step on your spiritual journey, friend? Will you take it?)

My writing reaches people in 65 countries, so join us by being uniquely you! (And by doing what everyone else does!)

Photo Credit – Good Luck Is A Comin’! by Dayne Topkin on Unsplash

1 (But what’s the difference when it gets right down to it?)

How To Add Some Unexpected Color To Your Life!

Self-portrait – photo above.

So, how do we add some unexpected color to our lives?

  1. Wear red shoes! (Like Me!) Or,
  2. Ask God what new item He wants to serve up in your life!

(How do you need to add some color to your life?)

Be alert, be present. I’m about to do something brand-new. It’s bursting out! . . . (Don’t you see it?)

The Message

My writing reaches people in 65 countries, so be uniquely you and join in with what everyone else is doing!

The Guaranteed Perspective Of The Mind That Will Make You Transition Well To Your Next Season

When I remembered this, my life transition suddenly became a lot easier!

person crossing net bridge

I wrote something sappy about kids growing up last time, and another time about sending our first kid off to college.

If you haven’t read those Newsletters yet, I’ll summarize them for you: Whiny, whiny, boo-hoo, cry, send our kid away… boring, boring. But this is the thing that really bothers me, as I think about it a bit more.

Click HERE to continue reading.

Thank you for liking me! I like you too! Let’s journey together!

How To Look Super Awesome! The Only Hack You Need!

If you wake up in a terrible mood, the best piece of advice I ever received is to ensure that day that you:

  1. ”Wear whatever you want!”

And then the second half of this advice is to:

  1. ”Keep wearing whatever you want every day for the rest of your life!”

So, when my husband took a random, impromptu picture of me today against a bright yellow background, holding my bright yellow coffee mug and my bright yellow backpack (You can’t see it in that picture, so here is the next picture!), I finally understand why people were staring at me so much today.

It must have been because I look so awesome!

Anyway, I hope that people know that you’re awesome, too, as you stroll through life!

Oh! And so how can you look super awesome like me, you ask? Well, the only trick I know is to wear what you want! I hope that helps!

And more related advice HERE!

You’re welcome!

Good luck!

How To NOT Flush Yourself Down The Toilet!

And other helpful advice so you can soar like a bird!


a black and white photo of a bird flying in the sky

So I was a bird, soaring in the clear blue sky, when someone down far below aimed their shotgun towards me (or towards something close to me?) and fired. I fell like a lead weightto the ground and landed with a painful “thud”. When I carefully examined myself, I couldn’t find a gunshot wound. 

The shot must have just grazed my ear (Wait – Do birds have ears – WHATEVER!).

Click HERE to continue reading.

Thank you for liking me! I like you too!Let’s journey together!

2 Solutions To The Problem Of Needing Love!

Need some looove?

Get a bunny!

Yes! If you put a bunny upside down, like in this photo, and hold her “snugly,” we can be sure that the bunny IS loving us back – of course!1

Another option is to quiet yourself down and align yourself with the love God has been pouring out over you your entire life!

Cost: $0-$59.99 (Our bunny was LESS than 60 bucks!)

You’re welcome!

Good luck!

Thank you for liking me! I like you too! Let’s journey together!

1 By the way, it’s the same with my dog – I find that if I put one arm around my dog’s neck and squeeze him tight, he also likes to cuddle with me!