How To Rise From The Dead This Easter Season

The amaryllis opened its two enormous blossoms this week, revealing pink and white splendour and raising the scent profile of the room to a higher level.

And I am that amaryllis.

And so are you.

Let me explain.

About two decades ago, a neighbour gave us an amaryllis bulb in a cardboard package. “Water is all that is needed!” the box guaranteed. Beauty was promised to erupt from within this dry soil and ordinary pot.

I was excited about this, but I forgot about the plant in its little cardboard box in the rush of moving to another city. I felt guilty when I noticed it again a couple of years later. It was strewn between other forgotten items in our garage.

I gave it a few drops of water half-heartedly, looking at my watch as I waited for it to sprout life.

Then I got distracted.

“Well, I gave that a try, at least,” I thought, many years later when I saw the pot, out of its box now at least, but perched precariously on some items that needed sorting in the bowels of our garage. At least my guilt at not having TRIED to bring it to life was dissipated. “But I should give it another try,” I thought on my lunch break one day years later.

But when lunch was over, to-do items kept me running in circles. Days stretched to weeks and months. Another decade passed.

Our kids outgrew even more clothes, and I returned their small clothing items to the garage to deal with later.

“Remember me?” the amaryllis seemed to ask that year as I dumped a pile of too-small clothes on the floor beside it.

“We sometimes have to admit defeat,” I thought to myself, my advancing years having created a deep wisdom, called complacency, within. My few strands of grey hair had made me more rational and truthful. I didn’t look up from the floor as I spoke to myself.

My gaze had become limited.

I moved the plant to where we put things going to the dump.

At the prayer meeting that week, we were reminded to ask God to bring to life the seeds He had planted in us long ago. The ones He spoke in the whispers of the early morning hours or through the words of a friend – the ones we can’t quite find faith to believe.

And we were reminded to pour out our disappointments and frustrations to God. And to beg Him to make life sprout from the barren soils of our hearts.

And then I added a drop of water, two, on a whim that day to the amaryllis that was placed en route to the garbage dump.

Maybe?

And life sprouted.

And buds came in the form of hope.

And my soul was watered every time I watered that plant because hope was sprouting in me, too.

When the forgotten bulb in the little brown pot that hadn’t flowered in 20 years burst forth in all its fullness this Easter, I gazed at it in wonder.

And I don’t give up on you, either, Jesus whispered.

Because I know what the soil of your heart is capable of if you let Me pour some water on the seeds I have planted in your life.

Are you ready yet, dear child, to dare to hope in the impossible?

Friend, are you?

God can do anything, you know—far more than you could ever imagine or guess or request in your wildest dreams!

The Message

What impossible seed has He planted that you have forgotten about or nearly given up on? Does He want to plant an impossible seed in you today? Can you squeeze a few drops of Easter hope from dry soil to water this seed?

Consider asking for the strength to ponder this question, clean ears to hear His love, a heart to trust His goodness, and hope from the water of His Spirit.

And may your life blossom in great fullness against all expectations too, friend.

To God be the glory!

(Happy Easter.)

True Freedom For The Woman Is This (Join The Dance, Friend?)

She sat on the grass, picking wildflowers.

She danced alone in that grassy place.

Free.

My choice is you, God, first and only.
    And now I find I’m your choice!
You set me up with a house and yard.
    And then you made me your heir!

The Message

I waited in the lineup, laughing.

Then I danced on the speakers at the bar.

Free.

Love me, hold me, ‘cause I’m free to do what I want any old time. And I’m free to be who I choose any old time

The Soup Dragons and Junior Reid

What is true freedom, then?

The freedom we danced and sang of when I was a youth at the bar left many of us imprisoned, wrapped so tightly in our bondage that joy dissipated.

The constraints God defines for us bring us to that grassy place where true freedom and joy are found.

And I danced alone, outside in the field, to the music God sang in my heart again this morning.

Your God is present among you . . .
Happy to have you back, he’ll calm you with his love
    and delight you with his songs.

The Message

And so, what is best for the woman, dear friend?

Come.

I beckon you to this side of the fence, where true freedom and joy are found.

Have you found your dancing shoes yet?

Put them on! Come – let’s dance together, friend!

Joy awaits!

What are you waiting for?

God longs to delight in you, too, as you put your hand in his and follow Him on a journey.

The term Hephzibah is Hebrew for “my delight is in her.”

You’ll be called Hephzibah, my delight

The Message

Come and dance with us!

Instead of insisting on freedom to create spiritual reality, shouldn’t we be seeking to discover it and disciplining ourselves to live according to it? . . .

In many areas of life, freedom is not so much the absence of restrictions as finding the right ones, the liberating restrictions.

Timothy Keller, The Reason For God

Where Do We Go In Winter When We Are Lost Again?

Looking for a way out of another winter that suffocates?

A pika was lost in a snowstorm.

She looks around her. Which direction to turn? She is cold, alone, afraid and doesn’t have much time before the cold winter chills her to the bone. Death arrives quickly out in nature.

And that pika is me.

(You, too?)

Why a pika? Because who knows what a pika is? (And how known do you feel?)

We look around us, seeking a direction to follow or something solid to hold onto.

The days of our lives are thrown in the garbage can like the pages on our daily calendars. There goes another day, week, decade.

We find our first and then our 100th gray hair. Do we continue to pull these hairs out? At what point are we defeating ourselves, even harming ourselves, by pretending that the clock of time isn’t ravaging us?

What do we hold onto?

What direction do we travel next?

Who can lead us?

Do we hunker down, curl into the fetal position for warmth, and hope for spring?

Will the joy in our souls remain at the end of this winter?

Where is the warming hut, the cup of hot chocolate, and the friend with the listening ear?

I am here, He whispers.

Do you hear?

How To Defeat The Monster Of “Not-Enough-Time” Once and For All

Is time clasping its fingers around your neck, too?

Does it tighten its grip so you struggle for breath now and then, too?

Do the fingers around your neck create fear that makes your every breath panicked, too?

And so, how do we fight the enemy of time?

Openly discussing our fears is the hand that removes this snake from around our neck for a while.

Why is time so scary?

We watch the snake slither next to us as we sit here on the sidelines, pondering the game of life.

It doesn’t look so big anymore as we see it now, here beside us.

It is not the kind of snake that can choke the life from us, a constrictor. It is a harmless, small snake, but its pressure, when wrapped around our necks, feels suffocating.

And so, how is your life going?

Let’s chat, be honest.

Did you shoot and nail every basketball into the hoops you aimed for when you were younger and your dreams were less tarnished?

If you did, how are you doing now, after the applause ended?

Just another one of us, a straggler in old rags, sitting by the side of the court, wondering what the game is all about?

Yeah, I hear you. I put my arm around you. Got any wisdom for the rest of us – the confused, discouraged, and hungry?

I’ve got one story. Here it is:

A dilemma confronted her. The dilemma woke her in the middle of the night. It was the calm, clear voice of her Lord.

Invite him to stay here, He said.

She was supposed to invite him to stay at her home. Nothing too extraordinary. Except that he was the leader of one of the most savage street gangs in New York. He was a bad guy, rotten to the core.

Or so everyone knew, and the track record of his life proved.

And she was the proverbial sweet old lady, tough as nails inside, under the veneer of an opulent mansion, her world in order.

Invite him to stay here.

No one else would let him into their home.

But she did.

True story.

This one act, this time at her home, was the safe respite, like a rest in Rivendell, that he needed as he journeyed away from Mordor. (Apologies to non-Lord of the Rings fans for this sentence).

He couldn’t go back to the streets. His old gang would kill him. But he was forging a new path that would lead him toward Jesus and to an international ministry speaking about his life’s events.

But this story isn’t about him.

It’s about the woman who invited him into her home.

She took a risk.

She obeyed God.

[He] protested, “Master, you can’t be serious. Everybody’s talking about this man and the terrible things he’s been doing, his reign of terror . . . !”

But the Master said, “Don’t argue. Go!”

The Message

Of course, we can never know this, but as a thought experiment, what if this ONE ACT redeemed an entire life?

This ONE ACT allowed millions to be touched and inspired by a life that otherwise could have vanished in the wind.

Poof.

It’s possible, again as a thought experiment, that in this ONE ACT of obedience, the fruit from a life was as expansive as the sand on a seashore.

And I step on the snake next to me, crush its head.

God told the serpent:
“Because you’ve done this, you’re cursed . . .
I’m declaring war between you and the Woman,
    between your offspring and hers.
He’ll wound your head,
    you’ll wound his heel.”

The Message

Time is no longer around my neck, squeezing me, leaving me gasping for breath.

I obey God.

I leave the results of my life up to Him.

I fly.

You?

We’re Busy – Too Busy To Give And Receive Love (Oh Well?)

She was crying.

The little girl was clinging to her small blanket, wiping her nose with her arm.

We are busy. We have appointments. We dress to accomplish, checking the time as we walk past.

She stares around her, alone, in a world of busy, busy people.

Jesus sees her.

He kneels, offering her a Kleenex. She spontaneously hugs him, clinging round his neck, and he picks her up. Then he sets her down and guides her by the hand.

They walk away somewhere.

Where did they go?

We turn round for a minute, casting another look, pausing in our day. Where DID she go, we wonder? We MEANT to bring her some food and a warm blanket, to bring her home.

But we were busy.

Oh! And look at the time. And we are off again.

And Jesus is sitting nearby at that busy intersection, watching, watching the people.

He drinks his coffee and waits.

One of the busy men in a suit falls in pain.

Ill health is the cog in the wheel that stops his rush. He falls to his knees. He holds out his arms, willing himself to go faster, but his leg won’t obey. He looks up at the sky for help.

The people sidestep around him.

Jesus bends his knee and offers a brace, a cane and an arm to lean on.

They hobble away together somewhere.

Again, the busy people take a second glance.

“Was that man hurt? I meant to come back and check at lunchtime, on my break, but I got distracted. The good jokes in the lunch room distracted me, and it was too late. I had forgotten.”

“Wasn’t that Bob? He’s not here, walking with us anymore. Where did he go?” We ask each other, but no one knows. We weren’t paying attention.

Jesus sits with his coffee.

His eyes meet yours as you walk past him.

What is your response?

Will you pause?

Do you have time?

Our True (Homeschooling) North To Keep On The Best Track

Lawe Homeschooling Manifesto

But he’s already made it plain how to live, what to do, what God is looking for in men and women.
It’s quite simple: Do what is fair and just to your neighbor, be compassionate and loyal in your love,
And don’t take yourself too seriously – take God seriously.
The Message

1. To Enjoy – We want to have fun with and enjoy our children while we have them in our home.

2. To Think – We want our children to develop critical thinking before entering the mindset of this culture.

3. To Love – We wish to bond with our children in a stronger way, and to avoid peer orientation.

  • [Love] comes forth out of a relationship which has to grow and deepen. We can even say that the love between parents and children develops and matures to the degree that they can reach out to each other and discover each other as fellow human beings, who have much to share and whose differences in age, talents and behaviour are much less important than their common humanity. Henri Nouwen, Reaching Out: The Three Movements of the Spiritual Life
  • We forget how deeply they grieved as little ones… there is no greater cause of unhappiness than the lack of parental sympathy (i.e. What is it like to be in their shoes?) Clay Trumbull, Hints on Child Training
  • You will never have a better friend than a 3 year old. Clay Trumbull, Hints on Child Training

4. To Grow -We want our children to grow in wisdom.

Remember: in order for a perception to change one must be frustrated in one’s actions or change one’s purpose

Neil Postman, Teaching as a Subversive Activity



Dancing In Life = Community Praying For Us (Ready, Yet, To Dance?)

My dog looked up at me quizzically.

I have been giving him treats for “staying” and lying down in one position for more than a minute or two.

One ear cocked to the side, yawning sometimes – the dog’s instinctual response to say, “I’m trying to understand you here!” – sometimes excitedly getting it.

But most of the time, he stares at me, wondering how to get more treats.

And this is a perfect example of what we are like as we come before God.

He has something to give to us. The analogy breaks down here because God doesn’t simply tempt us with crumbs but has the full banqueting table to offer. But you get the point.

My dog sometimes forgets about me and my rewards and lies down distractedly.

And then I give him a treat.

And doesn’t that happen to us too? We forget about God, go about our business, and then we hear His heart whispering. He offers us food when we least expect it.

Well done, God comforted me, excitedly offering me a food reward. Huh? “What the . . .” I had just woken up. In my heart, I looked up at God, my head cocked to the side, confused.

He comforted me in His love, in His presence.

What was I doing right? I stumbled to the coffee machine, trying to put the puzzle together. The machine brewed, and God poured delight into my heart as the coffee machine poured delight into my cup. I scratched my head, trying to figure out why God was pleased with me.

I listened to HIS cues.

I responded to HIS call to obey.

The fundamental fact of existence is that this trust in God, this faith, is the firm foundation under everything that makes life worth living. It’s our handle on what we can’t see. The act of faith is what distinguished our ancestors, set them above the crowd.

The Message

He had been asking me to wake early, to write, to offer this page of food to you, dear reader.

And I obeyed.

That’s it.

Regardless of outcomes as defined by our culture, in God’s eyes, this writing is a success because it is motivated by obedience. Like a child with a crooked, smudged, stick-figure drawing, the parent is pleased with her art. God, the parent, is pleased with our crooked efforts at responding to His whispers.

And what you are seeing is the actor on the stage, the polished version of me for you to read about.

  1. God says write.
  2. I write.
  3. Applause.
  4. End of show.

But behind the scenes, there is chaos. An entire repertoire of people, those on lights and sound, and the director helped me look polished for you. They cried tears, remade the costumes, and helped me fit into my new identity.

I offer credit where credit is due:

1. Thank you to our friend who scared back the monsters intimidating me and offered me his hand. “Stand,” he said. And he prayed passionately that day in our kitchen, “She is about the King’s business!” he declared.

And I believed him. And I exchanged another piece of my old heart, the one linked to how people judge my life, for a princess robe. And I danced in joy.

And You danced with me, Jesus. Keep dancing, you whispered. Keep following Me where I lead child, regardless of what they say.

And I’m still dancing.

2. Thank you to my husband, the giant man. When I was in the metaphorical hide out, the place I shouldn’t have been, God led him to find me. He ducked to half his height to enter the place that held me captive.

When he entered, the evil shapes fled. He is not scared of the same things I am. His lack of fear terrifies them.

“Come, friend,” he offered, holding out his hand. “Don’t be afraid.” And he held me in his arms and comforted me as I wept. “There’s nothing to be afraid of.”

And there wasn’t. Because he regularly prays I will dance in freedom, in that grassy place. And so I do.

3. And I say thank you to so many of my friends. You prayed for me. And you told me what you thought God was saying to me, though you didn’t always understand.

And I took those pieces, precious as each one was, and I thought and considered and prayed and placed them into the puzzle of my life. Thank you. I honor you.

4.And I thank you for the eagle you sent, Jesus, who swooped down and woke me and fed me. “Get up.” She nudged me, and I rolled over, trying to go back to sleep.

But she was persistent, unphased by my life’s lack of spiritual success.“Try this food,” she suggested. I tossed that aside, too. I wasn’t used to the taste.

She tried milk, and I drank it with relish. I was thirsty. Later on, my stomach could hold a bite or two of meat. I was growing up.

“How is your time of worship?” she asked me again, and again, and again. Finally, I could answer her to say that I am learning to abide more frequently in Your presence. And the next time I danced, I held the sceptre you gave me, Holy Spirit.

And so thank you, Jesus, for the many, many actors behind the scenes of our lives.

Thank you for those who pray for us.

Join us in prayer?

Living Joyfully – Be A Liar, Nutcase, And Tyrant!?

So one day I’m sitting on the couch, head in hands, overwhelm consuming me.

The next day I’m dancing.

What was the path that took me from there to here?

Good question!

I’m glad you asked.

Here are the key stepping stones that led me across the river, onto a narrower path, without so many hurdles.

1. Pretend to be sick when you aren’t

What I mean is, if a few sniffles and a “headache” can help your kids bring you tea, quietly close the door behind them, and get all their homeschooling work (mostly) done in a hurry to “help” you out, then isn’t that just a helpful parenting strategy?

Yes, they may play a few more video games that day, but sometimes we have to negotiate with the enemy (is there perhaps a more precise word here?)!

And how do we need fewer “emotionally unstable” or “sick” days? This is the obvious question we want to ask ourselves as the mature adults that we are. We don’t want to HAVE to lie (I prefer the term “play pretend”) to our kids quite so often. What I’ve learned is the following:

2. Try not to be such a nutcase

Oh, come ON, admit it! You ARE a nutcase, too! I haven’t met even ONE homeschooling parent, for example, who didn’t start this way.

We start our homeschooling adventure with our new homeschooling planners (I have paid up to $99.99 for mine – a VERY expensive calendar with a bunch of blank paper inside).

We ALL start with our new, sharp pencils and energy overflowing from within. We purchase a shiny new curriculum or textbook and dutifully divide the book into 36 weeks, the total number of weeks in a school year. When we have completed this exercise with our stack of texts, we wipe the sweat from our brow and think – GREAT! I know EXACTLY what my kids will be learning on March 16, next year!

We pour ourselves a martini and wait for the homeschooling year to start.

What we forgot is that we are teaching little Machiavellis.

We also forgot that we are nutcases, and unfortunately, for 99.999% of us, we OVER-estimated our kids and our energy levels after Christmas.

Plus, they STILL cry every day when we do math.

And we are still in our pyjamas.

Another “sick” day, anyone?

Noooooo! That’s not for you!

We listen. We reattach our ears. We get down on our knees and humbly beg our God to give us wisdom in parenting in exchange for the promises each curriculum provides (none of it works anyway).

We ask for ONE or maybe TWO areas of prayer for each child. Oh, and for us.

God’s priorities will not be those we choose for our kids. We prioritize hockey and extra math lessons so that EVERY KID born in this country will be in the NBA (or whatever the popular sports leagues are) and have myriad universities begging them to attend.

Instead, we humbly exchange our vanity, linked to our child’s successes, for God’s chosen priorities for them.

And His priorities for us are interior postures of the heart, a heart sickness within each of our kids, and in us to focus on. Lying? Selfishness? Bickering? Jealousy?

Steep your life in God-reality, God-initiative, God-provisions. Don’t worry about missing out. You’ll find all your everyday human concerns will be met.

The Message

The other stuff comes.

Look at our family. We stink at looking good when we are homeschooling, and yet even our children have astonishing accolades! Maybe that’s just because homeschooling kids give hope to our culture.

Whatever.

The point is that when they leave the house, you’ll suddenly realize it matters a lot more than you initially thought that your kids are kind instead of culturally amazing. And then the nut doesn’t fall far from the tree! Just like a clean house, exceptional kids lacking in character are DEFINITELY overrated.

3. Become a tyrant

It’s the kids who are born as tyrants, but if you become a tyrant, there is order in the home. Then the true skill we need to learn next is how to become a tyrant to ourselves. We need to grow in the skill of bossing OURSELVES around.

When we show up at a paid job, in our office clothes and clipboard, we say “Yes Ma’am!”, do what we are told, then come home exhausted and put our feet up.

But when we show up on our first day of homeschooling, for example, no terrifying boss threatens to fire us each day.

It’s easy for us and our kids to stay in our pyjamas.

Learning to manage our own time is a skill.

Shout out to Mystie Winckler, who helped me a lot here.

Essentially, what is the MINIMUM work that needs to get done by my kids and by me? CHECKING my kid’s work is MY JOB I need to do, whether I feel like it or not. How am I doing with that job?

And if you find you are in overwhelm again? No problem, dear friend.

1. Declare another sick day!

2. Pray a LOT!

3. Learn a couple of tangible skills to proactively manage the ship!

It’s all about rhythms, and this is your rhythm, Mom, Dad.

Don’t give up!

You’re welcome!

Good luck!

Is God Calling You To Read This?

And so, why am I writing this blog?

I am writing this blog for you. This blog is a gift from the Father to you through me. And by you, I don’t mean you, necessarily.

You will know who you are – the you I am writing this blog for.

Is it you?

Or maybe you don’t yet know if you are you as you read a few lines and move on to something else.

But for YOU – there is something here that you need. So I write for you. Except that I don’t know anything about you – your tastes, hobbies, needs, or soul yearnings.

But God asked me to write. And so I write. I write for you.

I write because He whispered in my ear. I could almost sense Him one day in the library, excited. He wanted to show me something. I looked blankly at the wall of books.

He seemed to be saying that He wanted the voice of His children to create books for these shelves.

I believe He wants to flood the earth with books about His Kingdom written by His people.

He was planting a seed in me, showing me His heart, opening a bit of heaven’s storehouses to see a tiny glimpse of the treasures He wants to give us if only we can lift our eyes to see.

Write, He seemed to be saying.

But like Moses, I protest.

The soil of my heart where God so gently planted a seed is dry. The seed cannot penetrate the earth.

I tell no one what He has been saying. The soil is too hard.

But God brings the rain.

At the women’s breakfast with our church, she prays for me. “I don’t know what this means,” she begins, “but I feel like God is giving you a pen. And the ink is the Holy Spirit. As you write, the ink of Holy Spirit will guide you.”

And I weep and weep because her words touch the deepest layer of my heart, the part with the ear that only You have whispered to.

Can it be true?

Have I correctly been hearing from You? It took one of your beloveds to dig into the soil, turn it over afresh, and whisper into my ear confirmation of what Holy Spirit had already been saying. Write.

And so I write.

And if you are the one I am writing for, welcome. It is good to meet you. May these words feed your soul. For they came from the Father and pass, garbled, through my hands. I apologize for mixing up the words, ignoring what I should have written, and writing something else instead. For erasing what should have been left and for the messiness of this page.

But may you, even through the dirty, ripped page, be encouraged somehow.

For that is His way.

My heart is to obey in joy. May a few of these words encourage you, dear friend. And may you also, one day, hear more clearly what He is saying to you, so He can bless others, through you, with His voice, as well, garbled and mixed up, as we may understand it with our broken ears and our broken desires.

We endeavour to speak to the world what we think He may be saying. May many seeds from the dirt that we throw earnestly to the wind land on soil already moistened by Holy Spirit

For that is His way.

God said [to Moses,] My presence will go with you. I’ll see the journey to it’s end.

The Message

God, help us to plant the seeds of Your voice whispering to our hearts. Help us to scatter seeds afar of the life that has unfolded because we chose to walk with You.

And God, bring the rain, we pray. For this is the only way life can arise from the dust of our lives.

Consider asking God, what is one step I can take today to align my life to Your vision of who I am as I learn to walk more closely by your side?

Anyone Else Want To Dance In February Instead Of Sit In Despair?

As mentioned last time, my head was in my hands, a cloud of despair surrounding me, weighing me down.

Regardless of how I was feeling, I had to make a choice. Do I take another fun pill, declare another ski day, to distract from this swirling pit beneath me, my life, that threatened to consume me?

Or did I put on my work pants, and get busy constructing a new life for myself and for my homeschooling family, one that we would have the strength to complete all the way from September to June?

And you? Is anyone else feeling the February pull into that familiar black hole of despair?

How do we dance in joy through the dark month of winter?

1. We lift our despair, scoop as much as we can in our hands, and we lift this offering to God.

2. We listen. We reattach our ears. We practice the habits that are the glue helping our ears to stay stuck.

3. We tell others in our trusted community what we think the spirit of God is whispering. The sounds are muffled and garbled, and the sound waves pass through our hearts mixed with wrong motives, so we have trouble understanding.

4. We look for our dancing shoes. Where are they again? Where are those dreams? Where did we last leave them? Who did God say I am, again?

5. We gingerly take His hand and step onto the dance floor of our lives. He is in the lead, not us. Will we humbly let him lead our lives? Will we give up our right to drive our own car and our accompanying future car wrecks to learn how to dance?

The choice is yours. The choice is mine.

Come on, friend! The adventure of a lifetime awaits us! Get up off that couch!

God, all of us long for a good father who holds out a hand to help us up when we fall. The one who has everything we need to open the right door of opportunity for our future lives.

You are that Father.

Open our eyes to see this.

May we trust You more deeply. Help us get off the couch to escape from the lies we believe about ourselves and our lives.

You alone offer us genuine hope for our futures.

May we have the courage to step onto the dance floor with You.

Teach us to dance.


As you meditate on the words below and listen to the song below, take deep breaths and practice quieting your heart before God.

You did it: you changed wild lament
into whirling dance;
You ripped off my black mourning band
and decked me with wildflowers.
I’m about to burst with song;
I can’t keep quiet about you.
God, my God,
I can’t thank you enough.

The Message

Cry out to Him. What gift do you imagine He is giving you?

Quiet your heart again, and then ask God how He sees you. What do you feel? What does your mind imagine?

Is it time to look for some dancing shoes?