Humor

Blind To The Most Important Things? Borrow These Glasses So Your Heart Can See

/ Lori Lawe / Leave a comment
floating black and silver Aviator sunglasses
Photo by @felipepelaquim on Unsplash

I put on my gloves, breathing in the brisk fall air and preparing to stomp on some fallen leaves with her as we walked together.

I excitedly anticipated hearing what ups and downs on the journey of life had coaxed her to recently move to our little town by the river, and to join our homey little church.

Spending time with her felt like a bit of a slap upside the head, however. But the good kind of slap upside the head. The type of slap helps you see things afresh and shakes out the cobwebs.

[God will give] a thorough housecleaning, getting rid of all the historical and religious junk so that the unshakeable essentials stand clear and uncluttered.

The Message

“Oh, there’s Raymond,” my new friend muttered under her breath as we passed by a disheveled, drug-addled young man. I was anxious to get back to our conversation and see what happened next in her life story. I coaxed, “but what made you move to . . . ”

She wasn’t listening.

“Hi, Raymond,” she called out. He smiled, genuinely pleased to see my friend, and waved at the three of us. At that exact moment, I looked around to see who must have smacked my new friend, as her eyes were inexplicably filling with tears. The cold fall air, I wondered. A brisk walk often made my eyes run, too.

But she was still talking about Raymond.

“Sometimes I just hold him in my arms and tell him God loves him,” she whispered, her eyes tearing. I looked around for who she could be speaking about. Had an old friend of hers just passed us as well? There was no one else around. My neck craned in all directions, and I stared wide-eyed at my new friend, slowly understanding she was still talking about Raymond.

“You do WHAT??” I wondered, horrified.

I quickly composed myself. I mean, I am a Christian, so of course, I – ahem – knew EXACTLY what she was talking about . . . er . . . knew of people who knew exactly what she was talking about . . . er . . . I mean, who doesn’t grab the odd smelly bum we pass on the street and hold them in our arms, crying tears of God’s love for them?

To reassure me, however, I made a mental note to check my “Christian Club Membership Card” when I got home to ensure it hadn’t expired.

Her heart mirrored a tiny piece of the heart of Jesus, and her words seemed to mirror what would have fallen from His lips.

I stared wide-eyed at this new friend.

She was still silently weeping. “I sense such a Spirit of God on him,” she said so quietly it was almost a whisper. I looked back at Raymond, who was walking away from us. He had waved and walked on.

The image of tears of love spilling from her face onto Raymond reminded me of another woman whose tears of love spilled onto Jesus.

Just then a woman of the village . . . came with a bottle of very expensive perfume and stood at [Jesus’] feet, weeping, raining tears on his feet. Letting down her hair, she dried his feet [and] kissed them, and anointed them with the perfume.

The Message

You can love a person dear to you with a human love, but [many] can only be loved with divine love.

Leo Tolstoy in War and Peace

As we continued walking in silence, I wondered:

– WHO really is Raymond?

– WHO am I?

– WHO is Jesus?

It seemed I was blind to all three.

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How To Save* (Or Destroy?*) Your Marriage – Two Advanced Acronyms

/ Lori Lawe / Leave a comment

We start skiing on the green runs.

We start working on our marriage by successfully applying two nonsense words to our marriages. But you are ready for the blue runs, the intermediate terrain. One blue ski run (or intermediate acronym) for the daring only is:

Click here to continue reading this (previously published) post.

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The Best Climate Solution Hack Is To Focus On This One Other Thing Instead

/ Lori Lawe / Leave a comment
grayscale photo of person inside the plant formation

Just because the battle of [insert famous battle name here – I’m not a Historian, ok?] was lost, doesn’t mean those soldiers lost the war too!

The same is true in the war that many in our culture are fighting to open our eyes to the reality that climate change is real.

We’ve lost a battle or two, granted.

For example, consider the implementation of climate solutions and the recent US election. I am not a Harris supporter by any stretch of the imagination. (Also, I’m Canadian, so no one cares who I would have voted for. AND, it’s much easier to criticize leaders trying to create positive change than to come up with real solutions that work!)

The point is that we lost another battle in the war against recognizing that climate change is even a “thing” with the election win of Mr. Trump.

But just because climate change has lost another battle, that doesn’t mean we have lost the war in finding a solution to our climate woes – Not by any stretch.

It is time to close the chapter in the book “Let’s talk about climate change rationally, using science.”

Instead, let’s focus on applying and implementing this one solution.

Let’s focus on food.

No, I did not leave my rationale mind over there as I wrote this post over here.

Stay with me.

In Paul Hawken’s book “Regeneration: Ending the Climate Crisis in One Generation,” there is surprising hope in implementing Regenerative Agriculture.

Don’t have time to read?

Check out this free movie, Kiss the Ground Film | Official Website

A Hollywood Actor narrates the movie, so that’s how we know it is the truth!

Just kidding – There is LOTS of science here and a growing movement.

“Kiss the Ground is an audience-supported nonprofit promoting regeneration and healthy soil as a viable solution for our wellness, water, and climate crisis. Since 2013, we’ve inspired millions to participate in the Regenerative Movement through storytelling, education and partnerships.”

Kiss the Ground For Regeneration

Oh, and another benefit – when you put less poison in the form of hyper-processed foods into your body and recognize food ITSELF is healing, you’ll probably feel a lot better, too!

There is a movement of people who have started to be accidentally healed of various modern ailments through eating healthier foods, but we’ll talk about that another time.

Oh, and we can avert the climate crisis once this movement snowballs, too, without mentioning the term “climate change.”

The thing is (whisper):

God has a solution to EVERY problem we see in our world.

We have hope! Let’s dance! No problem is too big for our God.

As the song below plays, ask God, “Has my hope been reduced to the size of politics or the problems in my life and our world? Forgive me. Would You help me place my hope in the One who is bigger than every problem?”

“If . . . my people, my God-defined people, respond by humbling themselves, praying, seeking my presence, and turning their backs on their wicked lives, I’ll be there ready for you: I’ll listen from heaven, forgive their sins, and restore their land to health. From now on I’m alert day and night to the prayers offered . . . “

The Message

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Sick and Tired of Destroying Your Marriage? Two Unusual Phrases Show A Better Way!

/ Lori Lawe / Leave a comment
Photo by Xavier von Erlach on Unsplash

We were preparing our family to go skiing for the first time this year.

Only two people had mini meltdowns. Yes, one of them was an adult. Frustration levels were rising as we tried to find all our ski stuff for everyone.

Click here to continue reading this (previously published) post.

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Longing For A Better Life? Rejoice In The Gift Of A Smack Upside Your Head!

/ Lori Lawe / Leave a comment
woman in pink bikini lying on round concrete fountain
Photo by Alessio Roversi on Unsplash

When we were newly married, my husband left his shoes on the floor instead of the shoe rack, and I tripped on them.

When I tripped on them again, I politely asked him not to do this anymore.

Then I cried and hoped tears would implore him to put his shoes away after taking them off, a life lesson that was perhaps taught on a day he was absent from Kindergarten, so he never learned, even 45 years later.

Manipulative, imploring tears didn’t work either.

I tried anger, and nope – Nothing.

It looks like this one bad habit came WITH my husband, and so we fudged along, as couples who have been married for a long time do, until even this habit became “cute.”

Until it wasn’t.

After I broke my ankle, and for some reason, the “leaving shoes/ slippers” in the middle of where I am walking seemed to get a steroid hit. I found myself tripping over my husband’s shoes multiple times a day. So, I did the only rational thing a rational person WOULD do in this situation!

I began throwing his shoes outside.

However, this wasn’t the magic bean solution I had hoped for.

(Did I mention that I offer marriage advice as well?*)

And why, you are asking, are you airing your dirty shoe laundry ALL OVER the internet? Good question. It’s because of what happened next.

I poured out my poor, misunderstood heart (She didn’t QUITE have those words to describe me, though – Why not?) to a friend.

And she’s a great friend.

The kind who may even kick you in the rear once or twice, and your life often starts looking up after the pain.

Here is what she said the following week, “Lori, I’ve finally figured out the solution to your shoe problem!” she began excitedly.

We found a quieter corner of the church so she could impart her wisdom.

“Every time you stoop to pick up shoes and put them on the shoe rack, this is an opportunity for you!”

“Huh?” I asked, confused, remembering how my blood boils in righteous indignation at the sight of misplaced shoes.

“Yes,” she continued. “You can pray for where his feet go, and that the souls of his walking will be soft, and that God will lead his feet to travel wherever He wills for him and . . .” She was gushing now. “And I’ve calculated how long this will take you. It will be about 3 minutes of your day.”

She was right, of course.

And after the bruise on my butt heals where she kicked me, I think things are looking up in our marriage, too!

She gave me some INCREDIBLE, UNIQUE advice I could NEVER have figured out on my own!

And that’s why we need a community that loves us.

Because after the pain comes the healing.

If you reason with an arrogant cynic, you’ll get slapped in the face;
    confront bad behavior and get a kick in the shins.
So don’t waste your time on a scoffer . . .
Save your breath for the wise—they’ll be wiser for it.

The Message

Recent update on this situation: After this conversation with my friend, I asked God what to do about this situation. (Novel idea!) I envisioned my husband and I discussing this situation over a glass of wine, dinner, and a date.

On the date, he saw things in a new light – It seems my rational mouth spoke more forcefully than throwing his stuff outside.

The following week, he said, “Darn! I didn’t put my shoes away!” and ran to get them before I got to the front door.

“Darn! I lost my opportunity to pray for your feet!” I said, watching him put away his shoes instead of me.

God’s way is better. God is good. To Him be praised.

(And let’s thank God for a whack from a friend, too.)

Need a whack?

Reach out anytime!

You’re welcome!

Good luck!

Footnotes

*More marriage advice is coming in tomorrow’s post!

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Lose Fear With This Simple Life Hack!

/ Lori Lawe / Leave a comment
pug covered with blanket on bedspread
Photo by Matthew Henry on Unsplash

I know why you couldn’t sleep last night, tossing and turning.

I know why you are looking at me wide-eyed and wondering how you can live your life authentically.

I didn’t publish a blog post last Friday like I usually do, and THEREFORE, your normal rhythms for coping through life have been disrupted because I didn’t tell you how to live your life this weekend!

But first, I will explain why I didn’t write a blog post.

It was because I was busy. What was I doing? Remember in this blog post when I mentioned that our Pastor is a crazy nutcase because he travels to politically volatile places?

The places he visits for a fun vacation are some of the poorest countries on earth, riddled with civil war, genocide and other stuff we don’t like to think about because we need to get to Walmart and back before the ball game starts and if we think about other stuff, we may forget to buy all the snacks we need for the game. We all have a lot of things going on and to think about already – Thank you very much!

Anyway, while we were busy cleaning out our garage last week, I suddenly thought, “Why not join our Pastor on one of these trips to an unstable country?”

So, that’s why I didn’t write a blog post. Our Pastors had to talk me off the window ledge of my fear to jump into the unknown*. Should we go to the place where the worst day there is EVEN WORSE than my worst day, for example?

person wearing pair of black Nike shoes sitting on metal frame
Photo by Omar Prestwich on Unsplash

When I researched one of these countries, it seemed EVEN MORE DANGEROUS than our family vacation to Disneyland last year!

During that vacation, we got stranded in a shady area of Los Angeles, and no Ubers came because it was the night of the Oscars and they were busy driving celebrities. Luckily, an LA city bus driver held the bus and waited for us for 20 minutes until we could connect with another ride because the bus driver didn’t want us left alone there (How sweet!). So don’t worry, Mom! (She reads this blog.)

And so, what is the simple life hack to losing fear?

Find someone who is doing something stupid, and mindlessly follow them!

Since you are doing something scary, you no longer have to fear your fear!

So, our motto this weekend is:

  1. Do what you fear, and the death of fear is certain!

Another helpful thought for you to mull over as you continue to ponder this topic of losing fear is to consider the second reason why I didn’t write a blog post this weekend. It was because I spent many hours binge-watching a new historical period drama this weekend. So, another motto for this weekend is:

  1. Distract yourself with online entertainment so you don’t have to think about how to live well!

Choose your motto with whichever one fits best, and remember to read every blog post so I can help you live your life more authentically!

P.S. – There’s probably a third motto for how to shake fear and live authentically, but I haven’t figured that one out yet.

You’re welcome!

Good luck!

Footnotes

*There is not civil war in that country right now, as there was when these events happened to Chrissy Chapman, so it’s likely not quite as unsafe as I’m pretending it is, but stay with me for the emotional effects of this blogpost that I’m trying to create.

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Advice: Stop Being Afraid Of The Wrong Thing! Become Fearless (By Fearing This)! Part 2

/ Lori Lawe / Leave a comment
person jumping on big rock under gray and white sky during daytime
Photo by The Chaffins on Unsplash

Previously, we talked about the fear that sometimes descends over our culture like an unwelcome blanket, smothering us. And yet, we cling to our fear as a self-soothing exercise. We are used to it

How do we throw away the fear that always seems to linger on our hands, like unwanted gum we are trying to put in the trash?

We can’t entirely eradicate fear.

The reality is that we are tiny little people, and who knows? A comet may arrive in ten minutes, throwing us into another ice age like it did for the dinosaurs. Then we’re hooped!

But this, ironically, like all my best advice, is where we find some of our hope.

What if we didn’t fear “death” (I said THE word!) QUITE so very much?

It is the denial of death that is partially responsible for people living empty, purposeless lives

Elisabeth Kubler-Ross

This one fear, the fear of death, instead of being a blanket that twists itself around our neck, strangling us, is the one fear that can ultimately comfort us.

For example, it doesn’t matter to me whether I get two likes or one like on a post (No, that wasn’t 2,000 likes or 1,000 likes – Why do you ask?) when I remember that one day, I will die.

So, one of the best ways to eliminate a bunch of our lingering fears, it turns out, is to confront the biggest, most terrifying fear looming in our bellies’ most bottomless pit.

It’s to confront our mortality.

So, how do we recognize our mortality, though we (kind of) don’t want to?

When we realize that we are resting in the palm of our Saviour’s hand and that His love is the warm blanket that comforts us, we find we can sleep a bit easier, and this life is a little easier to live.

But what if we’re having trouble grasping hold of God as we clench our frightened fists around His Spirit, grasping for something to hold onto?

What if we reach out to touch God, and our fingers, instead, only close around thin air?

Well, let’s return to something I learned in university while wrestling most deeply with this question. (Don’t you find that you thought more interesting things in university? These days, the thing I seem to think about most is when I can next grab some deep-fried chicken or chocolate cheesecake.)

When I wrestled most deeply with this question at University, the philosophical argument called Pascal’s Wager, was a great balm to my soul.

Here it is, summarized. A fuller version can be found here:

  • There is not enough evidence to know with ABSOLUTE certainty that God exists, the mathematician and physicist Blaise Pascal began.
  • So, a game is being played with the endpoint of our deaths. What will be the outcome after our death?
  • The MOST RATIONAL choice is NOT to play this game.
  • However, NOT playing the game is not a choice. We all must die therefore we all MUST play the game.
  • When we play the game, we are wagering on God.
  • If we believe there is a God, and there is, we gain ALL.
  • If we believe there is a God and there is not, we lose NOTHING.

Wager, then, without hesitation that He is. (…) There is here an infinity of an infinitely happy life to gain, a chance of gain against a finite number of chances of loss, and what you stake is finite.

Blaise Pascal

As the song plays, consider asking God, “Am I afraid of the right things?” When we face our fear of death, a most surprising thing happens. Other fears seem to fly away somewhere!

Oh, Death, who’s afraid of you now?

The Message

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Afraid Your Homeschooled Child Won’t Fit In The World? Teach This One Life Skill!

/ Lori Lawe / Leave a comment
selective focus photo of boy standing on grey pavement
Photo by Terricks Noah on Unsplash

Today, I thought I’d teach you how to bond with your homeschooled kid by swearing at him!

This advice is a real-world example from my own life. 

The weirdest stuff in life is true, so that’s how you can be assured I am telling the truth today.

So, one day, I found my 12-year-old looking downcast and despondent. 

Click here to continue reading this (previously published) post.

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Advice: Stop Being Afraid Of The Wrong Thing! Become Fearless (By Fearing This)! Part 1

/ Lori Lawe / Leave a comment
girl in white hoodie jacket lying on green grass
Photo by Khashayar Kouchpeydeh on Unsplash

When she was in the hospital, only a few days before her death, my fierce, feisty, 89-and-a-half-year-old grandmother fixed her intense blue eyes on me and said the one thing I never thought she would say.

“Lori,” she said, “I never thought this would happen so soon!”

She was talking about death.

My mind was like one of those old-fashioned calculators that was overheating, trying all different ways to understand what she was saying to me. In the end, was she saying that she was 89 and a half years old and hadn’t figured out that she could die soon? Yup.

That’s exactly what she said.

Of course, the fact that we die was not a truth that my grandmother was wholly unaware of. This fact approached her through all the deaths she witnessed during the Great Depression and the Second World War. However, this knowledge seemed to approach her from the side, not head-on. Unfortunately, she suffered from anxiety in her long life and feared a lot of stuff. But she was too busy fearing other stuff to remember to fear everything!

And so, you’re probably afraid of the wrong things, too.

You cringe at home, cornered up against the wall, afraid. I know. I can see you.

Actually, I can’t see you, but we all kind of live that way.

Sometimes, it feels like a blanket of fear settles over us all. And this fear comforts us somehow, just like a blanket comforts us from the cold. The only problem is that as it comforts, it also eats away at our souls, destroying us.

a neon sign that says fear eats the soul
Photo by Amelia Vu on Unsplash

I pondered how to avoid fear as I read the book The Night The Angels Came about missionary Chrissie Chapman, who chose to spend her life in war-torn Burundi instead of peaceful Britain.

One day, she had a really bad week.

It was a bad week in a way that our first-world minds can’t really wrap our heads around. For example, her child was kidnapped. Yup. Seriously. That same week, a grenade was accidentally thrown into their yard as civil war was fought outside their house, and a gunshot bent the frame of her bedroom window.

Then, she was held up at gunpoint for a bag of rice due (in part) to food scarcity.

I look downstairs at my freezer, which is full of food, and I can’t remember what’s in it. So, I have a hard time relating to food scarcity. What a privileged culture we live in, in so many ways.

And yet, I know precisely how author Chrissie Chapman feels because I’ve had bad weeks, too!

I’ve had a bad week where fear was like a blanket, wrapping itself around my neck and choking me, too.

For example, one day this summer there was a clear blue sky, and the birds were singing. I live in peaceful rural North America, where the deer that eat my tulips are the most irritating intruders. (Why? Why do they have to do that?)

And yet, as I looked around, my heart was a cancer full of fear, consuming me.

What about those things in the news that might happen? What about that stuff I read on social media that might occur? And the worst question is, What if I’m worried about the wrong things?

So, as illustrated in the paragraph above, I can exactly relate to Burundian author Chrissy Chapman and her fears!

I’m just like her because my (peaceful) world makes me feel afraid, too!

And so how do we throw off the blanket of suffocating fear?

Let’s talk about that next Tuesday in Part 2 of this post.

For now, let’s constantly ponder . . . (that thing we never think about, that we all pretend will never happen).

You’re welcome!

Good luck!

Shhh. . . but:

(You learn more at a funeral than at a feast)

The Message

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Finding God Is Easy! It’s Just Like Finding Our Abs!

/ Lori Lawe / Leave a comment
woman in gray top
Photo by Tachina Lee on Unsplash

I choked on my coffee and almost fell over when I overheard my daughter’s online science class this morning. Here’s what was said, verbatim, because this is from the online recording.* (I’m not even exaggerating this time!)

Student: “They were so old they should have been hospitalized!” (Lori’s comment: I didn’t know there was an “age” at which hospitalization occurs!)

Teacher: “About how old?”

Student: “I dunno- Maybe 40 or 50 years old!”

My reaction reflected the fact that I personally MIGHT be INCHING toward (or way past) one of those ages this youth deemed as “should be hospitalized.”

That discussion inspired the post today – I know that none of us like to say this out loud or admit that this is a reality, but one day, I started growing older!

At around the same time, I noticed I had lost my abs.

I had always had abs as a youth. I even tree-planted (which means I’m tough), and that’s how I got some of those muscles.

man standing in front of LED bulbs
Photo by Xenia Bogarova on Unsplash

But somehow, one morning, when I woke up, my abs weren’t there anymore! I looked around, trying to find them. Then I learned that when you’re older, a higher percentage of your body turns into fat.

For example, here’s a chart of ideal body fat percentages aligned to age.

“Dang!” I thought that morning. “My abs turned into fat!”

“Oh well,” was my next thought. I had already dejectedly accepted my fate. A took another sip of my coffee and stared at the morning news.

I already said this in another post, but you weren’t listening, so I will repeat it.

(I mean, who has time to listen anymore? Especially when we all have so much to say! We only have 2 hours and 24 minutes to vent our passionate, frustrating irks on social media daily! And no, I’m not talking about me listening to you. I’m talking about you listening to me! Why don’t YOU listen to ME?)

So, I wanted to say I lost weight.

When that happened, I realized that my abs hadn’t turned to fat. They were covered in fat! And when the extra stuff was gone, there they were!

My abs came out from hiding.

Some of you are wondering where God is, as well. Maybe you knew Him for a while or had an experience of Him, just like I had abs when I was younger, but now where is He? Well, here’s the good news:

He’s right there, under your fat!

Under your spiritual fat, that is. He’s been with you this whole time! All you need to do is get rid of some of the junk.

It means we’d better get on with it. Strip down, start running—and never quit! No extra spiritual fat, no parasitic sins. 

The Message

As the song below plays, ask God, “What garbage do you want me to bring to the curb? And what one next step do I need to take to stretch out my hand to receive the beautiful gift of Your love that You long to pour out on me affectionately?” (I pray you make the exchange, friend.)

And may you find your abs, too! I mean God.

Footnotes

*Yes! They record classes online now! Those poor teachers! Do YOU want your every frustration toward insolent youth recorded? Thank God they haven’t yet figured out how to record every word we homeschooling parents utter! If you find yourself accidentally emitting a mischievous word, here’s a tip to cover up the incident.

You’re welcome!

Good luck!

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