Christian

Why You Should Read This Instead of Goal-Setting! AND 10 Funny Things They Said About Homeschooling, Aging, And Love!

/ Lori Lawe / Leave a comment

Got time to join us for a laugh, friend? (Put the goal-setting pencil aside for a bit.)

a group of people holding glasses of wine

I’m in extended holiday mode, so I’m not (quite) ready yet to set new goals, that I won’t achieve anyway.

However, stay tuned tomorrow (or soon) for how to start the year at a sprinter’s pace! (Though we will already be a bit behind because we are beginning our energetic goal setting a day too late!). Dang!

The new year has barely started, and you’re already a loser!

Join people in over fifty countries who read this to gain valuable life wisdom! (Or maybe they’re just laughing at me? . . . Whatever!)

How to catch up and pass everyone else (Or how to at least stay in the race a bit longer) will be discussed tomorrow (or soon)!

“We’re just happy to be here!”

Said Jen and I, to explain why we didn’t want the number of Devil’s Press (NOTICE the name, anyway?) and other exercises recorded that our team completed at the “Competitive-Partner-Get-Fit-Day” at the gym.

Anyway, I hope you also feel encouraged to start your New Year off with a bang of frenzied activity (That you’ll do soon)!

For now, as clearly and thoroughly elaborated in THIS ARTICLE, here is one of our past holiday newsletters to amuse you, while you look around for your pencil today to enthusiastically write out all of your life goals tomorrow!

Now, most homeschooling moms are looking forward to sitting on the couch with a glass of vodka after Christmas.

No, don’t get me wrong! I MEANT a tiny splash of rum in our Christmas eggnog! I am always misunderstood!

But instead of doing that, I wrote this holiday newsletter!

Anyway, it would have been preferable to have one of those lovely family Christmas photos – You know, where everyone is wearing those matching red hats, but who has time to book a photographer, coordinate ridiculously busy schedules, etc.?

This photo (SEE DISCLAIMER!)1 will have to do. We took it tonight, impromptu. Sure, some of us MAY be in costume attire, but this is what we look like. On reflection, elf suits may have been a slight improvement.

In past years, we included memorable quotes from various family members in our New Year / Holiday letters. This year, we include ten quotes on Homeschooling, Aging, and Love. Enjoy!

On Homeschooling

Kyah: “I’ve had a pretty good day so far!” Time: 7:13 am

Andy: After his shower, “Hey! Where was my soap? I couldn’t find it?!!”

Me: “Oh, sorry! Kyah carved it into a turtle and entered it in the fall fair yesterday!”

I mentioned lunch.

Kyah: “Mmm…lunch!”

What she was doing – eating breakfast!

Kyah was having an in-depth Zoom discussion with budding philosophers about the Easter holiday.

Suddenly, a shrill 10-year-old voice from Pennsylvania emanated from the computer, “Well, I think the Easter bunny should go to hell because . . .” An impassioned speech followed. A lot of great learning and critical thinking is in progress!

(She may need a bit more work on theology.)

On Aging

Me: “Where do you want to be in five years?”

Andy: “Where you are…!!!”

Me: (Oh!!)

Kyah: “And I can help you up the stairs!”

Me, thinking: “Will we functionally be 100-year-olds in just five years?”

Andy: “Next June, I will be 50. We should have a massive party.”

Andy remembered that we had a big 1990s party for him when he turned 30. Andy continued, “We can have another 1990s party! We can wear . . . jeans and . . . all the clothes I wear now…” … “and we can listen to … all the music I still listen to now!”

Esther: “I feel so much older now that I am seventeen. It’s a big difference from being sixteen, or fifteen, or fourteen. I don’t know why. Do you think it’s because seventeen has an extra syllable?”

Esther to me: “Whenever I make my hair look like yours, I get compliments. Whenever I wear your clothes, I get compliments.”

Me thinking: “I’m not completely irrelevant, yet!”

On Love

Andy: “I like it when you talk.”

Me: “What??”…(!)

Andy: “Well, most of the time.”

Kyah: “You are the best Mom.”

Me: “Well, thank you, Kyah, but I don’t think that’s true.”

Kyah: “No one is perfect, but you are the best Mom for me.”

And so we may not be perfect, but we are the best people that God put in our lives for each other.

I know that’s true with your family and friends, too!

Happy New Year!

Oh! And I think professional online writers like me are supposed to encourage you, especially on New Years! And so, as this song sings, “. . . make a list and do not make it brief. Write down every single wish and every little thing that you want” (Seriously2?) – Well, good luck with that!

As for me, today I plan on doing a little more skate skiing, enjoying my favorite soup with friends and family, and trying out some of the new board games we received at Christmas.

(And as you write your exhaustive to-do list for the year, remember to keep one ear open to Holy Spirit. You’ll have more luck pursuing the activities God is ushering you into in your next season.) However, to be safe and ensure we are actively setting goals to be like everyone else, we will soon discuss setting not S.M.A.R.T. goals, but S.T.U.P.I.D. goals, to help you even more!

Stay tuned!

You’re welcome!

Good luck!

Thanks for liking me! I like you too! – Proven HERE, HERE, and HERE! Let’s journey together!

Photo Credit – Happy New Year! by Debra Manny Mosley on Unsplash and It’s Us!

1 DISCLAIMER: My family stays mad at me for longer each time I post embarrassing things about them on the internet lately (It’s not like ALL of the five billion people on the internet read every word!). However, to keep them happy, I deleted the photo of my entire family that accompanied this article. They didn’t want the family photo posted SIMPLY because some of them were wearing dress-up clothes, pajamas, or something (I couldn’t keep track of ALL their complaints). Anyway, good thing you like me!

2 My wants (synonymous with needs, in my case) are a giant bucket without a bottom that would completely consume me as well if I focused too much on them! But whatever works for you!

12 Funny Things They Said About Love, Homeschooling And Other Stuff That Will Make You Laugh (With Us!)

/ Lori Lawe / Leave a comment

Pull up a chair! Have a little laugh – It’s on us, friend!

long-coated brown animal

As clearly and thoroughly elaborated in THIS ARTICLE, I require an EXCESSIVE amount of time this holiday season skiing and soaking in a hot tub.

However, given that some of you in the fifty-three countries1 who read this drivel (no-STUFF!) can barely function without my constant wisdom flooding your inbox, I will be posting some of our Christmas/ New Year’s letters from past years here to help you through this season with adequate wisdom and insight to complete the bare minimum of your holiday activities.

You’re welcome!

Good luck!

Click HERE to continue reading.

Thanks for liking me! I like you too! – Proven HERE, HERE, and HERE! Let’s journey together!

Did Christmas Make You Disappointed? How To Open God’s Beautiful Gift

/ Lori Lawe / Leave a comment

Want to borrow a pair of scissors, friend?

person holding red and white box

Who isn’t excited to open a present?

Even for the most hardened of hearts, a brush with hope in an unopened present makes the soil of our hearts ready for the seed.

And what happens when we open the box and find nothing inside? We turn it over and examine it from another angle. Did we miss something? We take the box apart before finally setting it aside.

Click HERE to continue reading.

Join people in over fifty countries who read this to gain valuable life wisdom! (Or maybe they’re just laughing at me? . . . Whatever!)

The Truth About Christmas Sorrow And Joy – It May (Actually) Be The Same Beautiful Gift

/ Lori Lawe / Leave a comment

Got time to open a gift, friend, regardless of the packaging?

Our family got a Christmas tree together in the woods this week, which is a perfect family experience that we (of course) always end up having!

Join people in over fifty countries who read this to gain valuable life wisdom! (Or maybe they’re just laughing at me? . . . Whatever!)

Even my doggy helped us find the right tree for us!1

But did we hold hands and sing Christmas carols the entire time, you wonder, with rapt attention?

That wasn’t EXACTLY the case if I’m completely honest, which, of course, I am all of the time when I write online.

In fact, upon careful reflection after this event, at least one person was mad at another almost the entire time! (But not me! I was only mad twice during that whole time! And I was only involved in one of the fights over which Christmas tree to get!)

Other than that (I.e., THEM), we had a wonderful family time!

Reflecting on this experience made me realize that getting a Christmas tree was like a mini microcosm that reflected our entire year2.

This experience also reflects all of our homeschooling times, where joy and sorrow are combined, sometimes even at the same time, and always in the same day.

And so, why is the gift of Christmas sorrow and joy (basically) the same thing? Because we are little bundles of joy and sadness all mixed up together. Both are inside the package of “us” at any one time, if we know where to look.

I’ll illustrate with another example that happened again when we were decorating our tree this morning.

When I was about to hang up the Christmas ornament that reminded me of my dad, who passed away a few years ago, I blurted in uncharacteristic honesty, “You know, I’m sometimes still mad at my dad for dying!” My kids looked at me with their wide, astonished eyes, their Christmas tree ornaments held in mid-air, candy canes about to fall out of their mouths, wondering (with a bit of trepidation, perhaps?) what would come out of my mouth next. But my husband knew that I just needed a hug and a little cry.

And then I was fine again and joined in our after-we-put-up-the Christmas-tree family dance.

Because even on our best vacation, the one where we “get away from it all,” the shadows of sorrow follow us. And even the longest, darkest, most desperate night carries within it the inevitable threat and hope of dawn.

We can never completely release ourselves from either sorrow or joy because we have both within us all the time.

So may our lopsided tree, with a few sparse spots, remind us that the journey to finding Christmas hope isn’t always as straightforward as we would like it to be.

But may we savor the joy of each day, release the sadness when necessary, and anticipate our inevitable transformation that both the gifts of joy and sorrow bring, as we hold the hand of God, put on our ears to hear the voice of Holy Spirit better, and follow Jesus on the next step of our spiritual journeys this season.

Merry Christmas, friend.

Thanks for liking me! I like you too! – Proven HERE, HERE, and HERE! Let’s journey together!

1 Check out his ridiculously snow-packed paws! He was busy digging up the tree to contribute in his unique way, too! (Like when he barfed that OTHER TIME.)

2 For a COMPLETE, in-depth summary of our year, read more HERE.

The Exciting Gift Your Heart Craves Is Found Under Your Neuroses! Surprise!

/ Lori Lawe / Leave a comment

Got time to open a present, friend?

selective focus photography of gift box on person's palm

I was spinning in circles, putting up a decoration on the tree with one revolution, beating back my dog in the daily effort of chaos management, who was sneaking licks of the Christmas pudding, again, trying to find my worst, ugliest Christmas sweater in time for the curling party, while still spinning the plates that keep our lives circling round and round – food prep, clean up, laundry, and then the alarm rang in the early hours of the winter dark to do it all again.

Click HERE to continue reading.

Join people in over fifty countries who read this stuff to gain valuable life wisdom! (Or maybe they’re just laughing at me? . . . Whatever!)

8 Funny Things They Said About Love, Homeschooling, And Healthy Food That Will Make You Laugh (At Them)

/ Lori Lawe / Leave a comment

Pull up a chair and laugh WITH (Wait – AT?!) us, friend!

woman in black and white crew neck shirt smiling

As clearly and thoroughly elaborated in THIS ARTICLE, I require an EXCESSIVE amount of time this holiday season skiing and soaking in a hot tub.

However, given that some of you in the over fifty countries1 who read this drivel (no-STUFF!) can barely function without my constant wisdom flooding your inbox, I will be posting some of our previous Christmas letters here to help you through this season with adequate wisdom and insight to complete the bare minimum of your Christmas activities.

You’re welcome!

Good luck!

We enjoy publishing a letter and sending it to all our friends and family for the Holidays.

Click HERE to continue reading.

Thanks for liking me! I like you too! – Proven HERE, HERE, and HERE! Let’s journey together!

Advice: The Best Thing Is To LAUGH! WHY? Because You’re Ridiculous, Too! Oh! And Happy Christmas, Friend!

/ Lori Lawe / Leave a comment

Here Is Our Christmas Letter To Update You On Our Family and Our Year!

Please find our annual holiday “Newsletter1” below!

This is where we update you on our family and share some insightful sayings that our family members shared this year to encourage you! And so, “What happened this year?” You ask? I’m glad you asked!

Thanks for liking me! I like you too! – Proven HERE, HERE, and HERE! Let’s journey together!

Well, our youngest child decided to leave home a year earlier than anticipated.

She’s planning to move out this summer, which sent me into a (SLIGHT!) identity spiral:

“Who am I if I am not a mom homeschooling her kids?”

Luckily, I have been researching starting another Master’s Degree (I’m smarter than I let on) or a certificate, or additional schooling of some sort, to try to claw my way into some sort of cultural significance. (Or should I get more counselling instead to work on the neuroses that drive me? Well, I guess we’ll see whether a year of schooling or a year of therapy is cheaper.)

As long as I have enough going on to keep me busy and distracted, that’s my goal!

So, yes, given my new plans, as described above, for when all the kids move out, everything is great!

Now that we’ve got all that sappy and annoying “real” stuff out of the way, not much has really changed around here.

We putter around a bit. Our kids putter around a bit, do their homeschooling, and then they move out and leave us, one after the other. (That’s FINE! Who cares?). Our animals, a dog and a rabbit, putter around a bit, too, as usual.

That’s about it.

Anyway, without further ado, here are some quotes family members said last year. May you have a good laugh (At our expense?! – WAIT! IF you laugh, EVEN ONCE, MAKE SURE you send us some of the stupid stuff YOU said so we can laugh at you, too!)

Why not?

We’re all ridiculous. We might as well admit it! And then let’s laugh together!

Andy to me: “Yes! I DO want you to come to the hockey game with me! Why? Because I’ll have more fun if you’re there! Everything is better with you. You’re like whipped cream.”

Did I mention that we are celebrating twenty-five years of marriage this year? If you’re marriage is on the rocks, copy and paste what Andy said here to your wife! More marriage advice HERE and HERE and below!

Kyah, as she was about to do math – “Oh wait. I have to get my headset so I can listen to classical music so I won’t cry.”

And so, as you can see, not much changes in our homeschooling rhythms, either! “If you have to cry, go ahead and do it!” is what I say when I homeschool my kids! You can find more helpful homeschooling advice HERE and HERE!

Me to a young man from our church, “You’re a good boy.”

Kyah: “Mom! Why do you talk to him like that! That’s the same way you talk to the dog!”

Young man: “She’s trying to embarrass me, but she ends up embarrassing herself.”

Me: (!)

THE POINT is that not much seems to change with me, either, despite my pouring money into (obviously useless) therapy! However, more articles on how to excel relationally and even to have fun with others can be found HERE and HERE!

Significant changes in our home INCLUDE that our predator (dog) and prey (bunny) ARE changing!

A LOT!

Andy to me: “You are like Cesar Millan. You ARE the dog whisperer.” The dog was peacefully lying at my feet during supper2.

Then Andy said, “I NEVER thought I would say THAT about YOU!”

Me, thinking: “WHY did he have to say that last line?”

However, we can now leave our dog and bunny alone together – unattended! Actually, our bunny gently (but manipulatively) nibbled at the dog’s toes once. Our dog is so sweet and good-natured that the bunny now terrifies the dog when she jumps around the house, asserting her dominance.

(I’m sure there’s some great marriage advice in there somewhere, but I’ll need some careful reflection time to extract it from this life situation. So I may require a lot of time for skiing, relaxing in the hot tub, etc., during this Christmas break. However stay tuned and expectantly anticipate more helpful relationship advice this coming year!)

And so, Merry Christmas! We hope you feel caught up on everything that happened in our lives this year! And we pray God overflows your lives with blessings, as you hang fast to the rope as it swings you through life!

You’re welcome!

Good luck!

Photo Credit – This is us in a choir that we joined this year. (Maybe new things ARE brewing…?) Do you sense a possible change in the weather, too, friend?

Forget about what’s happened;
don’t keep going over old history.
Be alert, be present. I’m about to do something brand-new.
It’s bursting out! Don’t you see it?

The Message

Don’t you see it, friend?

Thanks for liking me! I like you too! – Proven HERE, HERE, and HERE! Let’s journey together!

1 News! Hahahahaha!

2 (Because I “dropped” my food.) But why tell everyone that part?

The Truth About The Most Painful Christmas – It Was Actually The Best Christmas

/ Lori Lawe / Leave a comment

Do you sense the hope just over the horizon, too, friend?

underwater photography of person soaking under sun rays

I held my head in my hands, the non-physical pain consuming me, twisting my body to reflect my inner state. The mother placed the baby in my arms and spoke of WHEN I would take her home and envelop her in our family. This baby was the gift that came no less miraculously than a child that emerges, astonishingly, from one’s own womb.

Click HERE to continue reading.

Thanks for liking me! I like you too! – Proven HERE, HERE, and HERE! Let’s journey together!

Advice: Give Jesus And Faith An Extra Look For 3 Obvious Reasons

/ Lori Lawe / Leave a comment

(Spoiler Alert: Because you’re wrong! Three times!) You’re welcome! Good luck!

a woman sitting on a blanket looking at her reflection in a mirror

He was hilarious, the way he screwed up his lips and tried oh so carefully to hit the correct BASS and not TENOR note at the community harmony choir last night.

He had a neck tattoo and otherwise was a teensy bit “tough” or “scary looking.”

But he was singing his heart out about a snowflake in winter, and his concentration, bent over the songbook, made him oblivious to those around him, who were staring at him.

Thank you for liking me! I like you too! Let’s journey together!

And to be clear, when I say he was “scary looking,” I mean he was to OTHERS! I NEVER assume to know someone’s heart by their EXTERIORS! PLEASE!

However, the comedian we watched the previous night, Shayne Smith, also had neck tattoos and complained that people judged him because of this. “People always assume I was in a gang!” he ranted. Well, he WAS in a gang for a while, we learned later that night, but what was THE POINT?

Oh yes, the point is that:

People may not be EXACTLY who you think they are!

And if I’m honest, I will often scratch my head and wonder who I am when I look in the mirror.

For example, we once had some youth over for dinner. The youth looked at our wedding photograph taken twenty-five years ago and scratched their heads asking, “Who in the WORLD are those people in the photo?”

Obviously, it’s us!

Obviously, we look EXACTLY like we did back then! Everyone knows that! Or maybe everyone doesn’t know that.

People mislead themselves all day long . . . We dupe ourselves in order to deceive others, creating social advantage.1

Scientific American -Living a Lie: We Deceive Ourselves To Better Deceive Others

Perhaps I don’t even know myself as much as I think I should!

And so you may not be EXACTLY who you think you are, either.

And if we’re wrong about others and even wrong about ourselves (I, at least, can admit to being wrong about myself ONCE, for example), maybe we’re wrong about God too.

Jesus is not who we expected him to be, either, actually.

Maybe God is not a mean ogre in the sky, waiting to zap you for your misdemeanors.

Maybe Jesus got off his throne in heaven and suffered pain and rejection on earth to have a shot at wooing you. Perhaps his body and his heart broke and are breaking for your return love of Him. Maybe every thought you have about God that is tied up neatly with a bow is wrong.

And so why give Jesus another chance this season?

Well, the answer to that question is obvious!

(1) You were wrong about others,

(2) You’re wrong about yourself,

THEREFORE

(3) You’re probably wrong about Jesus, too, if you’re honest!

The prayer that precedes all other prayer is, may the real me meet the real you

C.S. Lewis

As the song below sings, “come to Me all you weary,” consider asking Jesus what you may believe about Him that isn’t, in fact, true. And may Holy Spirit help you to “lay down your head,” so He can “give you rest” as you “leave your cares,” this season, friend. God, help us to hear Your whispers of truth about ourselves, others and You, we pray.

Thank you for liking me! I like you too! Let’s journey together!

Photo Credit – Got Time For Another Look? by Anna Keibalo on Unsplash

1 Huh? THAT part is DEFINITELY wrong! Please!

2 Guaranteed, Official Ways To Win In The Craft Fairs And In Life!

/ Lori Lawe / Leave a comment

Go ahead, friend! Win! Why not?

a group of vases sit on a table

I humbly mention that I RAKED IN accolades at the Christmas Craft Fair1, because I won a ribbon in EVERY category that I entered!2

Thank you for liking me! I like you too! Let’s journey together!

As I am a clear WINNER at Craft Fairs and at life, I wanted to share some of the hard-fought wisdom I’ve learned.

You’re welcome!

Good luck!

I learned these essential truths:

1.Sometimes just showing up is enough to guarantee success!

Sometimes, we can use the experience of entering the Craft Fair to allow others to elevate us to such a lofty level that we can look down on the “Losers” in our category! And then we can feel better about ourselves! (In my case, there weren’t any “Losers” in one of my categories as I was the only contestant who entered that category3, but THAT didn’t stop ME from looking down on strangers who walked past me at the Craft Fair! I had a ribbon – TWO ribbons! “Did they?” I asked them silently with my eyes, as I puffed up my chest a bit to make sure my ribbons were on display.)

There are many ways to increase our fragile self-esteem by (humbly, of course!) looking down on others.

So, enter the Craft Fairs and go to the gym and to church!

2.Refuse to listen when people “Judge” you at the Craft Fair or in life!

For example, I felt my blood pressure rise to the level my therapist says will kill me if I don’t learn a “Successful Coping Strategy” (Whatever that means). When I got home, I had a fit, which my poor daughter was around to witness, where I complained loudly about the Judges who are not fair to contestants like me! The reason I was so upset was that my competitor’s (i.e., the enemy’s) oatmeal cookie submission won second place.

However, my dessert won third place, simply because I didn’t add any sugar to my baking submission.

People who VALUE the fact that I didn’t dump cups of poison onto the food to satisfy judges with unreasonably sweet tastes (called a Bliss Point which varies by culture) WOULD have at least considered that FOR A DESSERT WITHOUT SUGAR, it was pretty good!

“Why do I let other people judge my dessert, my cookies, or my life?” I wondered in a frenzy of frustration.

Yes! Why do you? I sensed the Spirit of God confirm to my heart.

Why, child?

He was pleading with me.

And just like that, I was convicted of being a bit of a nutcase again. NOT a nutcase in that I am DIFFERENT from others, but a nutcase in that I am the SAME as others. Why, too, do you let others judge your cookies, or your life, friend?

These judges don’t even VALUE the same things you do, whether it’s healthy food, or chasing hard after a God who doesn’t make sense a lot of the time.

Riches I heed not, nor man’s empty praise

6th-century Irish poet Dallán Forgaill

We sang the song with the above lyrics this week at church, and my heart felt a little more centered, a bit more aligned with true north. How is the compass of your heart, friend? Does it need a little realignment, too?

To bring your car, ego and life into realignment, consider reading stuff like THIS.

And I hope that your nutcase-ness is exposed a little bit, too, so that God can gently remove a bit more of the cultural rot from your heart, too, friend!

Thank you for liking me! I like you too! Let’s journey together!

Photo Credits – How To Know You’re A True Winner! by Jelly Dollar on Unsplash, MY ACTUAL RIBBONS! (See? I DO SO tell the truth, sometimes!)

1 Fall Craft Fair, actually, but I don’t want you to know that I forgot about this crumpled-up page of writing that I found in a crevice of my bag this week, because in the fall (of course!) I was too busy swimming in the local lake and now (of course!) it’s ski season AND I just bought a fat tire bike so I can ride on the snow! (Meaning I’m BUSY PEOPLE! PLEASE!)

2 Two categories.

3 Yes, I DID win SECOND place in a category had only ONE contestant (me) due to “Quality Concerns” or some nonsense like that! Whatever! Reread Point #2.